My Own Way To Heavan

I am drunk on time right now; my mind has been let loose to ponder on the profound and profane underbelly of my tangled mind. I suppose it is this intoxicated mixture of boredom and rebellion that has driven me to place my head on the chopping block of our Conservative little world.

I know full well that I am willingly drowning myself in a narrow minded puddle of "how dare you's" and "shame on you's" and "be damned with you".

and while I through myself over the edge of judgement I fear not the crucifixion.

I don't go to church.

I don't believe in church as an institution.

as the words roll of these keys I can see the conservative hackles rising, I feel the mouse cursors close the window. But for those of you left I proceed to explain my motives for putting distance between me and the great halls of Christianity.

I cut my religious teeth on the cold hard benches of a very Afrikaans church. My father never joined my mother my little sisters and I as we filed into the silent corridors of indoctrination Sunday after Sunday and never answered me when I questioned him on the point. It didn't take me long to find these answers and my opinionated nature grew faster than my ability to wield tact.

I realised that those highly thought of figures on the pulpit were scaring me into believe, Satan and eternal damnation scared me onto the "right path".

A little while latter I tried the water again. I found a church that made sense.

I was free to call myself an evolutionist without being labeled an anti Christ. The writings of the bible no longer contradicted itself because effort was made to see past the literal.

But I was offended by the churches attitude towards woman, when I stood up and said that I am not mearly a vessel for breeding children and my genitals makes me no less worthy of doing the lords will I was met with uncomfortable stares and candid whispers.

I left there for fear of exorcism and I will never go back.

Most recently I have found that my faith in God all mighty is at an all time high, I no longer question the lords will because I am not being lectured on it by a mortal.

I believe that he heals and that he loves because I dont have 2000 (no joke there are more than 2000 different christian churches in the world) different people pulling me in different directions.

I am the Lords Church and confusion is satans greatest tool of destruction.

I dont need to hear ghost stories to scare me into believing and I know that God accepts all people because without the doctrines of the Church I am free to accept all people